Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Tuesday Ten

I find myself actually looking forward to Tuesdays now that I'm doing a weekly Tuesday Ten. (: This is very nice, therapeutic. Anyway, I was having a lot of trouble deciding what I wanted to write about, but I finally came to it:

Ten Things I Wish I'd Known at 14

I started high school when I was fourteen, and I went in thinking the world of it. And after graduating I realized I did have many good times in school, but it wasn't nearly as fun as my first two years at college alone. So anyway, here's a few things I wish I'd known then.

1. DO NOT PROCRASTINATE. This word defines my entire high school career. I never did things in advance, it was always night before they were due. In college, this only works every once in a while. I've been really good this semester about not procrastinating. Actually, last night was the first time this whole semester that I did procrastinate and it did not feel good. I was in a such a rush. It was 12:30 AM, and I was about to go crazy. Just ask my roommate, Mary

2. It's okay to be afraid of the dark.... Confession; I used to be deathly afraid of the dark. I slept with my television on at night all through high school. If someone was in the room with me and it was dark, I didn't mind because someone else was sleeping in the room. But if I was alone, I would freak out. This past year at school though, our TV is never on, let alone at night. So, I sleep in the dark all the time. And it's okay because Mary is here, but she goes home Wednesday nights for India training and so I'm alone. But the TV still stays off. I've learned to not care anymore. I don't know why I was so freaked out. I think it was because I've watched too many scary movies. My bad. But I've gotten used to not having the TV on when I sleep anymore that when I go home I can't have it on because the light disturbs me.

3. Boys are not important. Okay, yes, boys are cute and nice and sometimes fun to be around, but I've liked being single... for the most part. It's fun. I don't have to make plans to be with someone. I don't have to deal with the awkward transition time of spending time with him and then with my friends. I don't have to worry about what if he and my friends don't get along. I don't have to have the fights and drama. It's nice. Plus, someone once told me that it's better not to have a boyfriend your first year of college just because you get to establish your own friends and such. And so I'm just dragging that theory over into my second year as well.

4. Time heals all wounds. When I was in high school, for me, everything little thing was like "the sky is falling". Fight with a friend? Never speak to them again. Guy doesn't like me? Forever alone. C on a test? F in the class. I was a wreck. So if I was ever in a jam, I felt like it would never get better. But it eventually did. And I'm learning now that even though I feel this way now, I'm not always going to feel this way. Eventually, I'll snap out of it.

5. Friends are forever. Yes. Yes, they are. In high school, I told my select group of friends that we'd keep in touch even if we all went to different schools/states/countries/etc. And we have. But I've quickly learned in college that I'm going to stay in touch with these friends even more than my high school friends. I feel like in college, you can be more picky with your friends because you basically see them 24/7, rather than the 7 hours in school and the couple hours on the weekends. I feel like in college, people choose their friends more wisely, because they are more mature than when they were in high school and because it's like a fresh start.

6. Learn how to do the laundry. Yes, my mother was still doing my laundry at 14. And yes, I did eventually learn. I just wish I'd done it more so that it didn't have to be such a chore when I came to college. Although, I've been cleaning the kitchen since I was 10 and that's still a hated chore.

7. One day, you will not be afraid to sing in front of people. If you told me this when I was in ninth grade, I would have laughed in your face. I was terrified to sing in front of my family, let alone people I didn't know. When I was a kid, I sang anything, anywhere, any time. But once I got into middle school and high school I didn't sing unless it was in the car along with the music. When my family asked me to sing, I said no. And then eventually gave in, but reluctantly. I started voice lessons in ninth grade and had a hard time singing in front of my teacher, Allison. But eventually I became comfortable with her. Then, she told me I had to sing in a recital. I thought I was going to die. But the real thing that gave me so much confidence was partly taking on the position as praise and worship coordinator for BCM and then singing at Bowery in May. A very large portion was singing at Bowery. I was so changed after that trip. I don't even know what happened. A wave of calm just came over me and I've never been the same since.

8. Don't give A.J. such a hard time. I love my little brother, but sometimes he just annoys me to no end. And yes, when I was younger I would yell and argue for no reason, and I still do it now. But I should probably stop because I'm older and I always get fussed at because, "You're 19 years old, and he's only 10. You should know better.... blah blah blah." Yes, I know.

9. Swallow your pride. I'm still telling myself this one. I have a lot of pride, and people may or may not see it. I don't know if I hide it well, or if I let it show. But some things really bother me and then out of pride I go against the grain. This stops me from trying new things and asking for help. I should really work on this one.

10. Do what you want. Okay, I say this within reason. But, I feel like when I was in high school I could have done more things that I wanted to. I was kind of a homebody when I was in high school. I would have rather had people over at my house than go to theirs. I liked to stay in and watch movies or play games than go out and party or whatever. I mean, yes, that's what I wanted at the time. But I wish I could have tried different things.